I would feel pretty stupid to criticise Israel when it comes out that my own government ordered their software. They supposedly didn't buy it, but it was on the table for negotiation.
I'd argue you still have responsibility for your government's actions, regardless if you voted for them. Your responsibility as a citizen is to hold your government accountable, whether that's by voting, writing letters, talking, protesting, or (in the extreme case) civil disobedience or rebellion.
Unfortunately, the more important it is to hold your government to account, the harder it is. I, personally, don't have the strength to do that, for all I talk of it.
Yes oversight and influence on the government is responsibility of citizens. It does not mean that citizen is responsible for government's actions (as in I am member of a group of people to blame for their government's actions). These two responsibilities are two very different things.