If gravity is not a force, how is spaghettification a thing? If you are stationary when you're weightless, how can different stationary parts of your stationary body move at the different speeds required for spaghettification to take place.
The way I try to understand this is that the stationary body is not a single particle but a collection of particles. Since the black hole distorts the space-time gravity in a humongous manner each of the particles in the body at different points in space-time have significant different curvature in space-time and hence would experience the different tidal "forces" which would account for spaghettification.
It's only a thing in an extremely high gravity gradient, such that one end of you experiences far higher gravitational forces than the other. This means that while you are in freefall "on average", overall there is a stretching effect as parts of you closer to the source of gravity try to accelerate faster and parts farther away are lagging behind.
